Monday, June 21, 2004

I am so glad I went to California. Now, when I am home, I realize that my world is so very much bigger than it always seemed when I was living here all the time. I realize that the little dramas of my family and my community aren't matters of life and death, and that I don't have to let them affect me so.

At the same time, these same dramas constantly wrench violently away all hope that I have for human decency. So many men and women leaving their spouses for others. So much unnecessary pain involved in that. Do relationships have no value to anyone anymore? If that's the case, it's an infinitely worse world to live in than I had ever thought before.

No one should marry before the age of 40. Seems like everyone I know ends up getting married, having some kids, getting divorced, and then remarrying at around 40, to live, in many cases, happily ever after until they die. What's the point? Skip the whole first part and don't contribute to overpopulation. Adopt some Chinese kids or something. Do the world a favour. It's not all about you.

It's still raining. Harder now. I think I'll go outside and scamper in it. Maybe it will wash away my cynicism for the moment. Or maybe not. I guess we'll find out, eh?

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